It’s a dirty game out here, so make sure you aren’t getting played in these streets. When you’re young and beautiful the last thing you should be doing is crying over some boy. Every guy you date should be better than your last. Yes, you will make mistakes, we all do. Just make sure you learn, and do better next time!
Dating is tricky, and unfortunately is does not come with a rulebook. Without a close feminine role model the only way to learn is from experience. Too many women seemingly repeat the same mistakes with men their entire life. Never learning, and staying stuck in a cycle of bad dating choices. It’s never too late to better yourself and your dating options. Regardless of age, if you have children, or anything else people say makes you “undesirable”. To win in dating is 100% about mindset.
Here are the top 10 guidelines to remember when dating…
10 guidelines to win in dating
1. You are the prize!
This should be at the forefront of your mind in every exchange with a potential mate. During the courting process he should be on his p’s and q’s trying to win you over. Men only appreciate things they have to work for, so don’t be afraid to be a challenge (however, challenge does not equal difficult).
If he does not see your value do not waste your time trying to convince him of it. Only entertain men that see you for the incredible woman you are. You, as a high value woman trainee, add beauty and depth to everything you’re involved in. If a man does not appreciate that find someone that does.
2. Never chase a man
He is always the pursuer, and you the catch. If he is not actively pursuing you don’t be bamboozled into pursuing him. Turn your focus onto yourself because again: you are the prize! A man will always show you how he feels with his actions. If his actions leave you confused he simply is not that into you. I know that’s hard to hear, but it’s the truth.
You never need to chase a man. It screams desperation, and puts you in your masculine. The problem with being in your masculine is it’s something you have to maintain giving you no room for rest.
In order to win in dating you have to let a man do the majority of the work. Let him plan dates, decide when you two should get together, and lead the direction of the relationship. Tell him what you want, but allow him to make it happen.
For some, allowing a man to pursue you may not come naturally however it is a skill you must master. This will require restraint. If you’re use to letting your emotions get the best of you acquiring restraint will be invaluable. I promise it will pay off and you will be much happier in your relationship.
3. Do not compare yourself to other women.
Comparison is the thief of joy. If a man treats you as just another option then let the birds have him. He clearly is not worth your time. There is no one like you, and never will be. You are unique and special. You must always remember that!
If his ex was so great he would still be with her, and if that girl on Instagram was all that then he’s be pursuing her. Know that you are God’s gift to him, and it would take him a lifetime to find another you. Period!
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4. You have options.. always.
Beautiful women always have options. ALWAYS! Don’t let these dusty men convince you he’s the best you’ll ever have. If he shows you he’s not the one know that there’s always someone better for you out there that’s ready to give you exactly what you want.
To win in dating you have to remember that dating is a numbers game. The more men you meet the better your chances are at finding what you’re looking for. Don’t settle because again when you are young and beautiful you always have options. Never forget that. What one man won’t do another will.. with a smile at that!
5. Be with the man that loves you the most and treats you the best.
Listen, as a young girl I wasted so much time on men I liked more than they liked me. Though toxic may be fun stability is better. A man that loves you will constantly strive to express his love and appreciation for you.
If a man isn’t actively making your life easier he is NOT worth your time, energy, or body. If there’s nothing else you ladies take from this article please remember that. A man that loves you, and deserves to be in your life will go above, and beyond to do all that he can to make your life better.
A man that says he doesn’t do xyz know that he means with you! Be confident in what you want, and know that the right man will rise to the occasion. Remember: men show their love through their actions. How he feels about you will always be clear because he will show you consistently.
6. If he stops treating you special leave him where he stands.
To truly win in dating you have to know when to play your hand, and when to fold. You do not have to beg, plead, or cry to get a man to act right.
Calmly state how you feel about his actions, and if he continues to do it know that he isn’t ready for a woman like you. Walk away and find a man willing to meet your standards and requirements.
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7. Keep an abundant mindset
Always remember anything God takes away he replaces with something better. Never think you have to settle for any nonsense. Everything in life is optional, and you always have the option to leave. Keep the faith and know everything is working out in your favor.
Regardless of the time or energy you’ve invested into a man just treat is as a learning experience. This is easier said than done, but a necessary life skill.
8. Make sure your relationship goals align
Time is your most valuable commodity as a young woman. Invest it wisely. Know what you want out of a relationship, and state it up front. If he wants the same he’ll let you know if he doesn’t he’ll be ambiguous in his response, or if he’s a man with integrity he’ll tell you that’s not what he’s looking for.
Don’t let a man waste your time, but also don’t waste your own time by not saying what you want upfront. Too many women go with the flow and settle out of fear of losing a man. You cannot be afraid to lose a man. If he’s the man for you your desires will not scare him away.
9. Never give a man information about you that he could later use against you.
Listen.. these men are something else. At this point I’ve lost track of the amount of times men tired to hold something they knew about me over my head. I would never (again) underestimate the petty of a man that’s been hurt. Ladies, I highly suggest only sharing the most private parts about yourself with your husband, or a man you 100% trust.
To win in dating you have to keep your cards close. Men appreciate women with a little mystery.
10. Know that the relationship you have with yourself is the most important relationship you’ll have in life.
I know you may love some man, and are already planning a life together, but the cold reality is it may or may not work out forever. Things change, and so do people. In the event it does not work out you do not want to be lost in the sauce because that man was your entire life. You are the only companion that you will have for a lifetime as a fact!
Make sure you enjoy your own company. Create a life you love regardless of who is or is not in it.
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